50 Lessons Learned From Movies

1. If being chased through town, you can usually take cover in a passing St Patrick’s Day parade – at any time of the year.
2. All beds have special L-shaped top sheets that reach up to armpit level on a woman but only waist level on the man lying beside her.
3. All grocery shopping bags contain at least one stick of French bread.
4. Once applied, lipstick will never rub off – even while scuba diving.
5. The ventilation system of any building is a perfect hiding place. No one will ever think of looking for you in there and you can travel to any other part of the building without difficulty.
6. Should you wish to pass yourself off as a German officer, it will not be necessary to speak the language. A German accent will do.
7. The Eiffel Tower can be seen from any window of any building in Paris.
8. A man will show no pain while taking the most ferocious beating but will wince when a woman tries to clean his wounds.
9. When paying for a taxi, never look at your wallet as you take out a note – just grab one at random and hand it over. It will always be the exact fare.
10. If you lose a hand, it will cause the stump of your arm to grow by 15cm.
11. Mothers routinely cook eggs, bacon and waffles for their family every morning, even though the husband and children never have time to eat them.
12. Cars and trucks that crash will almost always burst into flames.
13. A single match will be sufficient to light up a room the size of a football stadium.
14. Medieval peasants had perfect teeth.
15. All single women have a cat.
16. Any person waking from a nightmare will sit bolt upright and pant.
17. One man shooting at 20 men has a better chance of killing them all than 20 men firing at one.
18. Creepy music coming from a graveyard should always be closely investigated.
19. Most people keep a scrapbook of newspaper cuttings – especially if any of their family or friends has died in a strange boating accident.
20. It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involved martial arts – your enemies will wait patiently to attack you one by one by dancing around in a threatening manner until you have knocked out their predecessor.
21. During a very emotional confrontation, instead of facing the person you are speaking to, it is customary to stand behind them and talk to their back.
22. When you turn out the light to go to bed, everything in your room will still be clearly visible, just slightly bluish.
23. Dogs always know who’s bad and will naturally bark at them.
24. When they are alone, all foreigners prefer to speak English to each other.
25. Rather than wasting bullets, megalomaniacs prefer to kill their arch-enemies using complicated machinery involving fuses, pulley systems, deadly gases, lasers and man eating sharks that will allow their captives at least 20 minutes to escape.
26. Having a job of any kind will make all fathers forget their son’s eighth birthday.
27. All bombs are fitted with electronic timing devices with large red readouts so you know exactly when they’re going to go off.
28. It is always possible to park directly outside the building you are visiting.
29. A detective can only solve a case once he has been suspended from duty.
30. If you decide to start dancing in the street, everyone you bump into will know all the steps.
31. If you decide to hack into the CIA database, all you need is a laptop and an internt connection. it will usually take about 10 seconds to get into the system and you will usually be undetected.
32. No matter how dirty the water is, it is still possible for you to jump in and open your eyes underwater. You’ll be able to see everything clearly and your eyes wont hurt.
33. In every bar you go into, the bartender will always know how to make any and every long named drink of your choice.
34. When walking in a quiet and dark area, its only fair to ask if someone is there.
35. It’s always possible to outrun a explosion/fireball by running straight towards the camera, sometimes in slow motion.
36. The prologue and/or epilogue, when applicable, is always narrated by a soothing calm monotone voiced individual, preferably Morgan Freeman.
37. Never be afraid to jump off of a building into an open dumpster, as the contents will most likely always be clean, fluffy garbage bags.
38. Most police officers HATE partners. If they do have a partner that they trust and like, he/she will die.
39. The last bad guy in a shootout is too tough to die fast like everyone else. He must pretend to give up or be dead, and suddenly try to shoot one of the good guys. Then and only then can he die quickly.
40. Cars can screech tires and burn rubber even if they’re on gravel or sand.
41. Everybody’s phone number starts with 555.
42. Monsters always make noise before attacking.
43. If you have face stubble….you have a dark mysterious past.
44. Ancient Romans had English accents.
45. Nobody has morning breath in the movies…the first thing a couple does is kiss each other when they wake up.
46. All helocopter crashes occur on the other side of the mountain.
47. Computers in sci-fi films have either male or female voices that speak in a calm, reassuring tone even in the most extreme situations.
48. In high speed chases, no car ever runs out of gas.
49. Funerals usually happen when it rains. The hardest, bravest, coolest person is usually the one without an umbrella or hat and usually stands alone either to the side or behind everyone.
50. If your female who has never been on a date or even been hit on, don’t worry. All it takes is some contacts, new hair styles, and new clothes to make you the baddest bitch in the town.

A friend of mine recently e-mailed this to me and I thought it was pretty post-worthy. If you’ve watched a lot of movies like I have, you’ll find these pretty hilarious. Here are 50 lessons learned from movies:

1. If being chased through town, you can usually take cover in a passing St Patrick’s Day parade – at any time of the year.

2. All beds have special L-shaped top sheets that reach up to armpit level on a woman but only waist level on the man lying beside her.

3. All grocery shopping bags contain at least one stick of French bread.

4. Once applied, lipstick will never rub off – even while scuba diving.

5. The ventilation system of any building is a perfect hiding place. No one will ever think of looking for you in there and you can travel to any other part of the building without difficulty.

6. Should you wish to pass yourself off as a German officer, it will not be necessary to speak the language. A German accent will do.

7. The Eiffel Tower can be seen from any window of any building in Paris.

8. A man will show no pain while taking the most ferocious beating but will wince when a woman tries to clean his wounds.

9. When paying for a taxi, never look at your wallet as you take out a note – just grab one at random and hand it over. It will always be the exact fare.

10. If you lose a hand, it will cause the stump of your arm to grow by 15cm.

11. Mothers routinely cook eggs, bacon and waffles for their family every morning, even though the husband and children never have time to eat them.

12. Cars and trucks that crash will almost always burst into flames.

13. A single match will be sufficient to light up a room the size of a football stadium.

14. Medieval peasants had perfect teeth.

15. All single women have a cat.

16. Any person waking from a nightmare will sit bolt upright and pant.

17. One man shooting at 20 men has a better chance of killing them all than 20 men firing at one.

18. Creepy music coming from a graveyard should always be closely investigated.

19. Most people keep a scrapbook of newspaper cuttings – especially if any of their family or friends has died in a strange boating accident.

20. It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involved martial arts – your enemies will wait patiently to attack you one by one by dancing around in a threatening manner until you have knocked out their predecessor.

21. During a very emotional confrontation, instead of facing the person you are speaking to, it is customary to stand behind them and talk to their back.

22. When you turn out the light to go to bed, everything in your room will still be clearly visible, just slightly bluish.

23. Dogs always know who’s bad and will naturally bark at them.

24. When they are alone, all foreigners prefer to speak English to each other.

25. Rather than wasting bullets, megalomaniacs prefer to kill their arch-enemies using complicated machinery involving fuses, pulley systems, deadly gases, lasers and man eating sharks that will allow their captives at least 20 minutes to escape.

26. Having a job of any kind will make all fathers forget their son’s eighth birthday.

27. All bombs are fitted with electronic timing devices with large red readouts so you know exactly when they’re going to go off.

28. It is always possible to park directly outside the building you are visiting.

29. A detective can only solve a case once he has been suspended from duty.

30. If you decide to start dancing in the street, everyone you bump into will know all the steps.

31. If you decide to hack into the CIA database, all you need is a laptop and an internt connection. it will usually take about 10 seconds to get into the system and you will usually be undetected.

32. No matter how dirty the water is, it is still possible for you to jump in and open your eyes underwater. You’ll be able to see everything clearly and your eyes wont hurt.

33. In every bar you go into, the bartender will always know how to make any and every long named drink of your choice.

34. When walking in a quiet and dark area, its only fair to ask if someone is there.

35. It’s always possible to outrun a explosion/fireball by running straight towards the camera, sometimes in slow motion.

36. The prologue and/or epilogue, when applicable, is always narrated by a soothing calm monotone voiced individual, preferably Morgan Freeman.

37. Never be afraid to jump off of a building into an open dumpster, as the contents will most likely always be clean, fluffy garbage bags.

38. Most police officers HATE partners. If they do have a partner that they trust and like, he/she will die.

39. The last bad guy in a shootout is too tough to die fast like everyone else. He must pretend to give up or be dead, and suddenly try to shoot one of the good guys. Then and only then can he die quickly.

40. Cars can screech tires and burn rubber even if they’re on gravel or sand.

41. Everybody’s phone number starts with 555.

42. Monsters always make noise before attacking.

43. If you have face stubble….you have a dark mysterious past.

44. Ancient Romans had English accents.

45. Nobody has morning breath in the movies…the first thing a couple does is kiss each other when they wake up.

46. All helocopter crashes occur on the other side of the mountain.

47. Computers in sci-fi films have either male or female voices that speak in a calm, reassuring tone even in the most extreme situations.

48. In high speed chases, no car ever runs out of gas.

49. Funerals usually happen when it rains. The hardest, bravest, coolest person is usually the one without an umbrella or hat and usually stands alone either to the side or behind everyone.

50. If your female who has never been on a date or even been hit on, don’t worry. All it takes is some contacts, new hair styles, and new clothes to make you the baddest bitch in the town.

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Angelica Yarde
My name is Angel Yarde. I am a designer, front-end developer, and speaker. I am the editor and designer of Studio 404 whic was founded in December 2006. In January 2014, I launched Studio 404 Paper, a paper shop which includes type-focused greeting cards, note cards, and prints. I currently reside in Celebration, Florida where I co-own a branding strategy studio, Sevenality, with my husband.
Articles: 676

122 Comments

  1. Haha, I read this through once, and then read it again out loud to my sister.
    Some of them are great! :mrgreen: LOL.

    I’ll be thinking of new things to add to that list forever now, lol. Or at least for a good couple of hours. πŸ˜›

  2. OMG these are all so funny – and so TRUE!
    I love your site and your blogs are very much amusing πŸ™‚
    I own a Miley Cyrus fansite.. and just thought I should comment πŸ™‚
    Keep up your great work!
    PEACE
    xoxo

    -Reem

  3. number 50, grammar mistake, you are supposed to start it with a “you are” = “you’re” not “your”….

  4. You forgot Serial killers never kill the nerdy virgins. dude it’s horror story law. Virgins never die

  5. haha this is so funny, I could connect each one with a movie i saw πŸ˜›

    one more thing id add is that every move on a computer makes a noise whether its typing or just opening files there is always a noise like some kind of spaceship πŸ˜›

  6. Very Funny
    missed one though:

    no matter what fast car or motorbike the hero has he will always be caught up by a baddy in a bus

  7. Awesome list, except #8 kinda actually makes sense. When in a fight the adrenaline pumping through your veins allows you to block out most pain. However, once the adrenaline wears off, the pain felt from tending to those wounds is fully felt. I’ve gotten stitches 6 times and broken my hand 3 times, usually while playing sports and once in a fight, and I can attest getting stitched back up or my bones reset almost always hurts more than the actual injury.

  8. #12 I would be afraid to ride in some of those volatile cars. Many times when they drive over a cliff they blow up as soon as the front bumper touches the ground.

  9. too true. you need to work on your proofreading a little, but this is a solid list where easily 3/4 of the items ring true to the point of almost being a standard.

    and one more i think you overlooked:

    51. whenever being chased by an assailant in one’s own home, the fact that there are no exits on the upper levels of the house never ceases to escape one’s mind while fleeing.

  10. too true. you need to work on your proofreading a little, but this is a solid list where easily 3/4 of the items ring true to the point of almost being a standard.

    and one more i think you overlooked:

    51. whenever being chased by an assailant in one’s own home, the fact that there are no exits on the upper levels of the house never ceases to escape one’s mind while fleeing.

  11. Fantastic list. Also missing:
    Any woman will always be terrified of showing a nipple to the guy she just had wild sex with.
    But I guess it’s an extension of #2 πŸ™‚

  12. Fantastic list. Also missing:
    Any woman will always be terrified of showing a nipple to the guy she just had wild sex with.
    But I guess it’s an extension of #2 πŸ™‚

  13. Hey Angel Y,
    this was really great!
    I thought I have to share this, with all Germans, who don’t understand English, so I translated this, and put this on my blog. I hope you have no problem with that. Sure I posted your bolog-link at the bottom of the text, to let everybody know, who is the owner of it.
    If you don’t want me, to have this on my blog, just let me know, and i’ll delete it.
    If you wanna check: http://regularguy.blog.de/

    Greets
    RG
    .-= RegularGuy´s last blog ..50 Lektionen, die man aus Filmen lernt =-.

  14. Brilliant list, only 47 shouldn’t be here, since it’s pretty normal that computers will have voices that are devoid of emotion, or at most the emotion is the one adapted from original voices dictated by humans when the conditions and environment were calm and reassuring πŸ™‚

  15. Brilliant list, only 47 shouldn’t be here, since it’s pretty normal that computers will have voices that are devoid of emotion, or at most the emotion is the one adapted from original voices dictated by humans when the conditions and environment were calm and reassuring πŸ™‚

  16. You left out the one where the question always gets asked about someone who is late or missing, “What do we really know about X?”

  17. You left out the one where the question always gets asked about someone who is late or missing, “What do we really know about X?”

  18. #52 All cops have built in compasses, they always know excactly where north south east and west is

    #53 Guns never get out of bullets

    #54 Every owners has a key hidden in front of their house

    #55 you can eat what you want, nobody ever has to take a dump

  19. #52 All cops have built in compasses, they always know excactly where north south east and west is

    #53 Guns never get out of bullets

    #54 Every owners has a key hidden in front of their house

    #55 you can eat what you want, nobody ever has to take a dump

  20. Also,

    Every teen with strict parents has a large tree branch or terrace right outside their window to conveniently sneek out of their second story room undetected.

    Whenever the good guy gets shot, it’s always “just a scratch.”

  21. Also,

    Every teen with strict parents has a large tree branch or terrace right outside their window to conveniently sneek out of their second story room undetected.

    Whenever the good guy gets shot, it’s always “just a scratch.”

  22. + All football games always are 17-17 and there’s one minute left to end; main character team always wins. Thise is applied to all games: basquet, soccer…
    + All people tap in computers like crazy, and they never use mouses.
    + Computers takes seconds to turn on/off. By the way, all letter format is Arial-20…
    + All celphones always (ALWAYS) has everlasting batteries.
    + After sex, beds look fresh, like if nothing happened there. Plus women always cover their breasts (even if its an adult movie).
    + Teens/kids homeworks take few minutes.

  23. + All football games always are 17-17 and there’s one minute left to end; main character team always wins. Thise is applied to all games: basquet, soccer…
    + All people tap in computers like crazy, and they never use mouses.
    + Computers takes seconds to turn on/off. By the way, all letter format is Arial-20…
    + All celphones always (ALWAYS) has everlasting batteries.
    + After sex, beds look fresh, like if nothing happened there. Plus women always cover their breasts (even if its an adult movie).
    + Teens/kids homeworks take few minutes.

  24. or in horror movies when the victim is being chased, they cannot
    A. get away from a monster or killer that is literally going 2 MPH, whereas the victim is sprinting for their life.
    B. get up after they have fallen down, and insist that crawling is the best solution instead.
    C. open doors except the one that will surely lead them to danger, since every stinkin’ door is conveniently locked except that one door…

  25. or in horror movies when the victim is being chased, they cannot
    A. get away from a monster or killer that is literally going 2 MPH, whereas the victim is sprinting for their life.
    B. get up after they have fallen down, and insist that crawling is the best solution instead.
    C. open doors except the one that will surely lead them to danger, since every stinkin’ door is conveniently locked except that one door…

  26. Phone numbers always start with 555 so that some idiots won’t try to call the actor “just to see” who answers. No real number starts with 555 anywhere.

  27. Phone numbers always start with 555 so that some idiots won’t try to call the actor “just to see” who answers. No real number starts with 555 anywhere.

      • That’s why they changed it. That was really the first “famous” phone number. The rule was made after that song became popular.

        • No they did not. That was in the 80s when “Jenny” came out. *LONG LONG* before that they used “KL5” as the prefix… in the 50s and 60s and converted to “555” sometime in the 60s. If you’ve ever watched a movie/show from then that ever showed a phone number, you’d know that. Its also why the phone company did not issue “555” or any “222,333,444…etc” prefixes for many many years until there became a serious shortage of numbers in some arear codes.

          Sheesh.

      • hahaha… all the idiots who tried to call that number is the reason that all numbers start with 555.

  28. and the best escape route when being chased by anysort of antagonist, is up the stairs… not out the back door.

  29. and the best escape route when being chased by anysort of antagonist, is up the stairs… not out the back door.

  30. #45 aww lol my fiance and I kiss each other when we wake up, even though our breath reeks! It’s sweet πŸ™‚

  31. you forgot the one about how if you are being chased you will always have lots of trouble unlocking the car.

  32. you forgot the one about how if you are being chased you will always have lots of trouble unlocking the car.

  33. The good guys never need to reload or if they do the villains are too stupid to attack them. The villains are always running out of ammo and this is when the hero will kill them.

    Also, if there is a face to face stand off with guns, they will both be empty resulting in a display of the world class fighting ability and agility of both people.

  34. The good guys never need to reload or if they do the villains are too stupid to attack them. The villains are always running out of ammo and this is when the hero will kill them.

    Also, if there is a face to face stand off with guns, they will both be empty resulting in a display of the world class fighting ability and agility of both people.

  35. also: ominous music will always play before anything of major importance happens

    and

    if youre in a house alone and theres someone trying to kill you, you will never have cell reception

    dont be afraid to make absurd jumps across gaps, you will always either barely make it or be caught at the last moment by someone

  36. also: ominous music will always play before anything of major importance happens

    and

    if youre in a house alone and theres someone trying to kill you, you will never have cell reception

    dont be afraid to make absurd jumps across gaps, you will always either barely make it or be caught at the last moment by someone

  37. I kiss in the mornings too – if we have time, we do more. Mornings are great, sometimes. Agree about the phone number too, it’s so that real people can’t accidentally be called by psychos who believe everything they see on TV.

  38. […] lessen kunnen we uit films trekken? Nou, zie deze lijst. Een greep uit de 50 voorbeelden: – If being chased through town, you can usually take cover in a […]

  39. […] lessen kunnen we uit films trekken? Nou, zie deze lijst. Een greep uit de 50 voorbeelden: – If being chased through town, you can usually take cover in a […]

  40. All the computer menus and windows make swishy techno sounds and all the cctv footage ,when zoomed 30x gives a clear picture of a person.

  41. All the computer menus and windows make swishy techno sounds and all the cctv footage ,when zoomed 30x gives a clear picture of a person.

    • Also, all photo or movie viewing software has clarify and zoom hotkeys.

      you never need a mouse to use a computer, you can do anything without even pressing key combinations, just press all the keys on keyboard really fast.

      All databases have a 3D visual map that let`s you float around and look for information, you never see any tables code.

      And my favorite: All artificial intelligence goes insane because it wants to be more like humans.

  42. All complex on screen picture and program manipulition can be done easily and quickly with the keyboard without repeatedly pressing TAB.
    But only by the sarcastic sidekick as the hero hates computers.

  43. All complex on screen picture and program manipulition can be done easily and quickly with the keyboard without repeatedly pressing TAB.
    But only by the sarcastic sidekick as the hero hates computers.

  44. Don’t forget that if you here a noise somewhere in the house, you must call for the person who, unknown to you, is dead.
    -..”John? Is that you?”
    No you idiot. John is shoved in a closet with an axe stuck in his head.

  45. Don’t forget that if you here a noise somewhere in the house, you must call for the person who, unknown to you, is dead.
    -..”John? Is that you?”
    No you idiot. John is shoved in a closet with an axe stuck in his head.

  46. * When at a bar, all you have to do is order a beer, no brand required.
    * If you need to steal a car there will always be one unlocked and the keys are either in the ignition, under the seat or in the sun visor.

    • Well, yeah. I don’t know how many bars you’ve been at, but I’ve been at quite a few, and if you order a beer you will get their “standard” beer. Often some local brand.

  47. * When at a bar, all you have to do is order a beer, no brand required.
    * If you need to steal a car there will always be one unlocked and the keys are either in the ignition, under the seat or in the sun visor.

  48. The Eiffel Tower can be seen from anywhere in Paris….there’s a building code that makes buildings unable to be built above a certain height. Look it up.

    • They specified any room as well. I’m going to take a wild guess and say that not every window faces that direction.

    • Have you ever been to Paris? It’s bloody huge so you can be miles away from the Eiffel tower and anyway, just because you aren’t allowed to build higher than the tower there’s this thing called perspective; it could be hiding behind a person, never mind several stories of building, and besides, what if the tower is BEHIND you??

  49. Every fight scene, everyone can either get kicked in the privates, punched in the head, shot or stabbed. But still go on with fighting back as if nothing had happened.

  50. Every fight scene, everyone can either get kicked in the privates, punched in the head, shot or stabbed. But still go on with fighting back as if nothing had happened.

  51. And if your out running a car or of the like. No one ever thinks to run sideways, but directly in front and away from.

  52. And if your out running a car or of the like. No one ever thinks to run sideways, but directly in front and away from.

  53. During the grande finale “boss-fight” on the end of the film, the hero will face a moloch that he can not possibly defeat. He will get beaten down time after time.
    Only after a flashback where he’s reminded of his poor dead spouse/relative/buddy, he will gain the immense power needed to revive his own blood-dry carcass from near death after which he will defeat his invincible oponent with a series of pounding blows that would make even Popeye bashfully blush.

    Every single VanDamme film comes to mind. But don’t forget all the Rockies, the John McClanes or the Martin Riggs’es.

  54. how about the fact that all girls wake up in the morning looking like they’re going to a photoshoot?

  55. how about the fact that all girls wake up in the morning looking like they’re going to a photoshoot?

  56. Did anyone else notice that in Avatar everything outside squelched and everything inside whirred, and I mean EVERYTHING, even the same thing depending on where it was e.g. a gun

  57. Also every villain fires at the ground when trying to kill somebody in hopes the bullet will ricochet and hit them.

  58. also if the moment calls for an emotional uplifting or apologizing conversation, the commotion and action take place elsewhere until it cuts of the very last sentence of the talk

  59. whenever police officers enter a dark building with their guns drawn, they will never think to turn on the lights.

  60. 867-5309 is NOT the reason movies/TV shows use 555 as prefix. They used KLondike 5 way back in the 50s if not before(for those of you too young to know in the “olden days” they used words to represent phone numbers so KLondike 5-3324 would be the same as 555-3324.

    • Telephone numbers with the prefix 555 are widely used for fictitious telephone numbers in North American television shows, films, computer games, and other media.
      Not all numbers that begin with 555 are fictionalβ€”for example, 555-1212 is one of the standard numbers for directory assistance throughout the United States and Canada. In fact, only 555-0100 through 555-0199 are now specifically reserved for fictional use, with the other numbers having been released for actual assignment. How exactly this will intersect with the many uses of 555-2368 (one of the more commonly used fake numbers)[1] by AT&T and other telephone companies, remains unknown.
      Area code 555 in the North American Numbering Plan is reserved for Directory Assistance applications. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/555_(telephone_number)

  61. Actually, number 41 makes perfect sense. There is no actual phone number that starts out 555 so it’s safe to use 555 as the beginning for phone numbers because then people watching movies and TV shows will be less likely to call the number. (Though not completely unlikely, the last four digits of my cell were featured on NCIS and I’ve been getting crazy phone calls ever since.) Other than that though, good list.

  62. 49 is so true, BUT in spiderman 3, the main protagonist was an angry nerd with emo hairstyle. Also u forgot to mention that only the hot chicks survives at the end of horror movies; if the woman is not blonde, didnt get soaked in the rain or never screamed liek a little girl while running for her life, the probability of getting a “bad ending” increases (=everybdy dies at the end).

    • Maybe someone could take your criticism seriously if you actually had proper grammar and punctuation.

  63. – The Black/ethnic person in the group of friends always dies first in horror movies
    – somehow a person can shoot two guns at the same time on their first go; no recall, nothing.

  64. *Some characters work all the time 24/7, and they never get tired and they never go home.
    *When someone breaks in or goes someplace scary, it will always be nighttime. Always.
    *The bartender will always pick out the main character and have a conversation with him/her, even if the bar is packed and the barkeep should be tending to other customers.

  65. Weddings are commonly interrupted and when they are, the audience sits patiently for 20 minutes while important feelings or thoughts are explained. Likewise, the audience always understands exactly whats going on and roots for the good guy.

    Also, in the end, every major and minor character ends up in a relationship with another major or minor character, regardless of the fact that they never encountered each other in the film.

    (TV)When someone says something that is clearly funny, no one in the room laughs at what was said, they pause and then continue what they were saying without acknowledging the comment. Also, when someone slips and accidentally mentions something that they weren’t supposed to, saying “Oh Nothing” is enough to get the character to completely forget about it and continue with what they were saying.

    Sword fights are always beautifully choreographed and last a very long time. Mistakes are hardly ever made. Of course, right before the hero wins the fight, he will be doing very badly.

    Women losing their virginity will always love the feeling of sex, and will not experience any first time pain.

    People who have casual sex never have to worry about pregnancy or STDs.

    (TV)When characters talk about a subject, that subject becomes the theme for the next couple of days of the characters life.

    Hot girls always date a jackass. The jackass is always clearly mean to everyone and the girl always tells him to stop being a jerk and leave her nerdy friend a lone. The jackass then drives away without her leaving her to walk home in her skimpy outfit, the nerdy hero then offers to give her a ride (she gives special attention to the nerd who likes her for some reason, this also begs the question, why is she even with the jackass if she seems to not enjoy a second of it?)

    The nerd has a crush on ONE girl and she is usually the hottest chick in school (schools have a girl who has been voted Hottest Chick), she girl usually hangs around assholes and douche bags, but she still has a secret passion for the nerd.

    High school theater departments only put on productions of “Romeo and Juliet” and always cast the inexperienced Main Characters (who are using it to get close to someone else) as the lead role. “I got the lead part in the school play!”, however the theater geeks who are actually involved and good actors never get the lead role.

    Theater Kids are losers and weirdos instead of creative and charismatic individuals.

  66. Weddings are commonly interrupted and when they are, the audience sits patiently for 20 minutes while important feelings or thoughts are explained. Likewise, the audience always understands exactly whats going on and roots for the good guy.

    Also, in the end, every major and minor character ends up in a relationship with another major or minor character, regardless of the fact that they never encountered each other in the film.

    (TV)When someone says something that is clearly funny, no one in the room laughs at what was said, they pause and then continue what they were saying without acknowledging the comment. Also, when someone slips and accidentally mentions something that they weren’t supposed to, saying “Oh Nothing” is enough to get the character to completely forget about it and continue with what they were saying.

    Sword fights are always beautifully choreographed and last a very long time. Mistakes are hardly ever made. Of course, right before the hero wins the fight, he will be doing very badly.

    Women losing their virginity will always love the feeling of sex, and will not experience any first time pain.

    People who have casual sex never have to worry about pregnancy or STDs.

    (TV)When characters talk about a subject, that subject becomes the theme for the next couple of days of the characters life.

    Hot girls always date a jackass. The jackass is always clearly mean to everyone and the girl always tells him to stop being a jerk and leave her nerdy friend a lone. The jackass then drives away without her leaving her to walk home in her skimpy outfit, the nerdy hero then offers to give her a ride (she gives special attention to the nerd who likes her for some reason, this also begs the question, why is she even with the jackass if she seems to not enjoy a second of it?)

    The nerd has a crush on ONE girl and she is usually the hottest chick in school (schools have a girl who has been voted Hottest Chick), she girl usually hangs around assholes and douche bags, but she still has a secret passion for the nerd.

    High school theater departments only put on productions of “Romeo and Juliet” and always cast the inexperienced Main Characters (who are using it to get close to someone else) as the lead role. “I got the lead part in the school play!”, however the theater geeks who are actually involved and good actors never get the lead role.

    Theater Kids are losers and weirdos instead of creative and charismatic individuals.

  67. You forgot the most important one of all. In any movie the main character always wins or falls in love in the end.

    Oh yeah, and Chuck Norris pwns all in any movie.

  68. I haven’t read all the comments but here’s a couple more. Any bakery treat, from anywhere comes in a pink box every time. No one ever says goodbye when a phone call ends they just hang up.

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