If you’re anything like me, your friendships were formed before you made the jump into full-time entrepreneurship. Although I’ve always had a business, it recently became my primary source of income in the past year and it’s made some changes in my social schedule. Whereas before, every weekend was pretty much open for friend-time, now I’m scheduling friend-time around meetings, deadlines, and location. It can be pretty tough and if your friends require more in-person social time, you might find yourself in some rocky situations. I want to talk about some ways that I’ve been managing my social circles while still keeping my business afloat.

Making the Jump

When starting to transition into being more business-focused, I was still working a 9-5 which meant no time for social events during the week. It was a bit overwhelming having to decline so many invitations but it really helped my friends transition into my new schedule. I would make exceptions for really important events but last-minute hangouts were pretty nonexistent. In the beginning, it’s important that you’re communicating your schedule with your friends and helping them understand why this is the best decision for you. Here are some easy tips to remember when you’re starting your journey:

• Not everyone understands what goes into owning a business. Try to be patient when explaining why it takes you four hours to answer e-mails.
• Focus on the positives! While it may be easy to complain about e-mails, marketing, and bad clients, try to focus on the positive aspects of having your own business. It helps your friends understand why you’re spending your Saturday night bookkeeping instead of going out with them.
• Talk about schedules early. Luckily, most of my friends are career-oriented or entrepreneurs themselves, so this part was easy. If your friendships are based on last-minute hangouts or coffee trips, you might want to be clear about the importance of scheduling meetups ahead of time. It’s just easier for everyone involved and it helps you transition into a new schedule.

Accepting Changes

The plight of the twenty-something is that friendships do change. When you’re running a business, sometimes that can be apparent very early on. Brand management is hard to do, especially when you have friends who don’t quite understand certain boundaries. I do a lot of social media work for my business and this blog so it’s important for me to make sure I’m setting a standard for my brand. Unfortunately, not all of my friends can understand that. It was time to set some boundaries and sometimes those boundaries can end friendships.

• Keep your personal and business social media lives separate. I don’t have any of my clients listed on my personal social media accounts, like Facebook. If I do, it’s because we were really close friends prior to doing business. I do, however, occasionally add blog buddies and it’s important that I’m aware of what’s being tagged/posted on my wall. Can you imagine how stressful it would be if your clients were all your friends? Make a separate account for your business and make sure your friends know, it’s business only. They’re free to support it but you don’t need posts asking about grandma from your uncle on your business page. Trust me, I’ve seen it happen to a business before and it was embarrassing.
• Address problems as soon as they arise. If you have a friend who makes really inappropriate jokes or seems to tag you in every chain image on Facebook, just let them know that you love them but it’s becoming a little inappropriate. Of course, this can cause conflict, but it’s easier to just stop problems before they get too out of hand.
• Friendships will end. Come to terms when you realize you’re having issues with a friend who has issues with the changes you’re making. It’s easy to address it with them and share your feelings, but in the end, sometimes people aren’t in it for what you’re doing for yourself. It sucks but you’re better off and it happens, entrepreneur or not.

Remember the Small Things

One of the things that makes it easy for me to manage my friendships is that I love what I do. I’ve never been happier working on things, no matter how difficult it is. My friends can obviously see that and in turn, it makes them happy for me. I’m good at what I do so I can always take time to manage my social life while still keeping my business a priority. It’s the small things that count. Here are some things I’ve been doing to make sure my friends still feel like I care, because I do!

• Cards are a girl’s best friend. I just love to give my friends cards, especially just because cards or to say thank you. A handwritten note of appreciation goes a long way. I love getting notes from my friends and I keep them all over my office.
• Texting is amazing! Can you imagine being a freelancer prior to the days of instant communication? You’d have to pick up the phone, hope they were at their desk, or leave a message on the answering machine. It’s a lot of work! I send love messages to my friends with quotes or things that I’ve been thinking of that reminds me of them. If we haven’t been able to meet in a while, it just helps them to know, you’re always on my mind. I know some people enjoy e-mails or voice messages which all can work.
• Do the impromptu. #TREATYOSELF Every now and again, just ask if a friend is available for lunch and drive out to where they work. Take an afternoon coffee break. It’s just important to keep the element of surprise in every now and again and accept a friend’s offer when they ask, especially if they really need it. I know how it feels to have a tough week and all you need is time to chat it out. I definitely try to make time for those chats. Just don’t feel obliged to make it an everyday thing but once a month doesn’t hurt.

I have crazy social circles and so some of these things work for some and some don’t work for others. It’s important to be able to balance relationships as it’s another part of growing up. Maybe in a few months, I’ll let you know how catastrophic things get when you add a baby into the mix.

How do you manage your friendships and your business life?

The post Entrepreneurship & Friendships appeared first on Studio 404 Paper.

1. Greek yogurt parfaits were a hit in my home in March. I also kept hydrangeas for most of the month. | 2. Recovering from being sick,  I practiced my garudasana at home | 3. Green smoothies started to take over my life. I did 15 days of green smoothies and they were great. 4. | I caught a great sunrise after an impromptu late night trip to Daytona. | 5. Fun decor from a pretty pink, black, and white baby shower I attended. Love the polka dots and pearls. | 6. My sweet dear friend returned with a great gift after a yoga retreat in St. Petersburg.

7. After being unable to sleep, I decided to try out this Morning Workout. It was a killer but so good. | 8. The latest catalog from Madewell was full of great type inspiration. | 9. More green smoothies? This batch included a great strawberry banana smoothie I made for my husband. | 10. My Design Is Inevitable print turned out pretty great. | 11. Taking a break from my usual black and white, to add a pop of color with mustard yellow skinny jeans. | 12. Naturally dyed Easter eggs from last night. Dying with teas and fruits will be my go-to egg-dying routine from now on.

Feel free to follow me on Instagram or share your Instagram URLs in the comments!

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– We moved into our first two-bedroom place. It seemed like so much space when we moved in but now we’re outgrowing it so quickly. Who knows where we will end up in 2012?

– I also became a crazy cat lady with my first live-in pet, Kitsu. She seemed to be a cat when we adopted her but now she likes to pretend that she’s part puppy.

– 2011 was definitely the year of the baby. I attended so many baby showers. I can hardly believe all of those babies will be one this year!

– I finally turned 21 with a 2-day birthday bash spent with my closest friends. It was my first successful birthday party so I was pretty pleased.

– We spent the weekend of Independence Day in Kauai, HI for our closest friends’ wedding. It was amazing and we left with so many memories.

– We took a lot of road trips from Ft. Lauderdale to Tampa to Daytona Beach and Atlanta. We definitely spent a lot of time in the car during 2011 but it worked out for great bonding.

– One of my best friends and I threw an awesome Batman-themed surprise party for my husband. I still can’t believe how much Batman knowledge I consumed in 2011. I made custom wanted posters featuring Batman villains along with with a plethora of other crazy things we did.

– Near the end of the year, I worked on creating custom fabric boards for the apartment. Who would have known I was so crafty?

– The year ended with an amazing Christmas holiday. I was so happy to have spent spoiling my two favorite people and many others as well. Also, my husband wrapped my gifts in the most amazing wrapping paper. I’m still in love with it.

So 2011 was a pretty successful year. I’m looking to do more in 2012 and hopefully accomplish more of my goals. To celebrate the new year, I created this 2012 print for you to download for free. I printed one for myself and I love it so hopefully you do too. Click  the picture below to download.

The post Happy 2012! appeared first on Studio 404 Paper.

Me: “How can I help you today?”
Customer: “I’m looking for a parcel.”
Me: “May I have your tracking number, please?”
Customer: “My what?”
Me: “Your tracking number. All of our parcels have tracking numbers which the sender can give you if you do not have it.”
Customer: “Why don’t you have it?”
Me: “Because I didn’t send you the parcel.”
Customer: “So, who did then?”
Me: “Sir, do you not know who sent you the item?”
Customer: “No, but my neighbor just had something delivered and I want one too. So send me something now!”
(The caller then muffles the phone and I can hear what sounds like sobs.)
Me: “Sir, are you okay?”
Customer: “I’m so lonely and I just wanted to get a present!” *more sobbing*
Customer: “I’m so lonely!”
Me: *speechless*
Customer: “Never mind, I’ll go now…”
Me: “Sir…wait. We do have a parcel for you. I just need to confirm your address to send it to you. It will be there this afternoon!”
(After he gives me his address, I have a quick whip around the call center and we get a card signed by the team, put in a few chocolate bars with other happy bits and pieces, and send it to him. He calls the next day and thanks us all. Now, he rings once a week on average, and we are all happy to chat with him.)

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Laotong means “old same” or kindred spirits. In old China, young women would be matched together and form laotong relationships. These are lifelong intimate friendships that offer emotional support throughout all of life’s ups and downs.

Throughout the book, the author goes through a detailed history of Lily and Snow Flower’s laotong relationship. However, reading this book, my heart ached. It was well-written and amazingly descriptive, but my heart ached. As I read about Lily and Snow Flower’s ability to have a life-long friendship (with some extreme ups and downs), I felt a piece of loneliness. I don’t believe I’ll ever have the ability to have a laotong relationship.

Now don’t get me wrong, I have a wonderful supportive fiancé who has been one of my best friends for the past five years. Even when we weren’t dating, he’s been my rock and my support system. I have friends who I consider close, but they’re scattered all around the globe. From the Northern Hemisphere to the Southern Hemisphere, it’s just hard to consider someone close when they’re so far away. I do cherish my friends closely, but the lack of a “sisterhood” in my life has become apparent. There’s not much I can do to change it.

I have had friends in the past, that I have considered close enough to be a laotong. I cherished them like family. I put them up on a pedestal, praising their life achievements, being the rock when they had their downfalls, and supporting them throughout thick and thin. Those feelings were obviously not returned and over time we grew apart. I didn’t grow resentment towards them, but simply pain that these people could find themselves abusing my kindness. It’s may me weary in becoming close to people at all.

Most recently, I’ve found myself dealing with this situation again. I won’t say much about it because I’ve felt like a weight was lifted off of my shoulder. The “friendship” caused me more agony and pain. It’s like coming out of a bad relationship. You feel so revolutionary, ready to take on the world. In my heart, there still longs for a fulfillment of my empty laotong relationship. I’ve noticed with a lot of people in my generation that we cannot find friends who are faithful and loyal. I’m sure it’s not different than the generations beforehand, but it just seems as if less people are willing to engage in friendships. I count the blessings of those who do have friends who are like laotong sisters. I secretly envy them as well. Perhaps in some time in the future, there is someone out there looking for a friendship as I have. After being burned so many times, it’s hard to even take a step towards a friendship.

Do you have any friends that you consider close enough to be a laotong? Have you had any bad experiences with friendships?

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